A Review: Finding balance between work and motherhood

This was a review written by Mel Gandevia and orignally published at The Well Planned Wife: http://www.wellplannedwife.com

In a true indication of how I’m struggling to find a balance between work and motherhood (and anything else), I started reading When Business Meets Baby, a relatively short book, about 8 weeks ago. I struggle to find the time to read these days!

This book is very special to me, because I’m quoted in it! It’s pretty exciting to have a book sitting on my shelf that I’m quoted in. The book focuses on the author, Rachel Allen’s, journey to both grow her business and settle into motherhood. Unfortunately, Rachel and I have shared the experience of losing our mums before our daughters were born, so Rachel asked if she could quote this post in her book.

When Business Meets Baby is also a collection of advice from high-profile working mums, including Carolyn Creswell and Janine Allis. Below is some of the advice I took from the book:

• The pressure many feel when becoming a mum is real: “Be The Best Mother. Keep the maternal health nurse happy, work towards the next baby milestone, go to mothers’ group, tell everyone how great you are doing. Smile. Cope. Get the baby to sleep without screaming. Do the books, update the website, answer emails, get some sleep.”
• The vision may not match reality: “Some new mums have a pre-conceived idea of what type of mother they will be. They often model themselves after their own mother (or parents), or they have a fantasy idea about what a baby should be like. They become lost in a world of trying to understand their new baby, and spend fruitless hours trying to meet an “ideal” of how things should be (an ideal that it rarely realistic). They do this instead of just enjoying the moment.”
• “Understand that it is OK to change your priorities as your baby grows, and it is OK to change the way you think. Parenting offers the ultimate gift of learning. Trust in your intuition across all areas of your life and business.”
• As the saying goes ‘it takes a village to raise a child’, but unfortunately, in modern society, many of us are going it alone. According to this book, “there is a solution: we can consider what roles are most important to us, accept our limitations, decide what we can let go of and learn to engage and respect outside support. At a deeper level we are being asked to examine our beliefs and attitudes around child-raising and to acknowledge that much of what we strive for is not really healthy for us or our children.”
• “A wise woman, Hazel Walker, once said that you can always earn more money but you can’t buy more time. Investing in help is my way of buying more time. The trick is to prioritise to make the very best use of your time.”
• “Everyone has the same 168 HOURS in a week, and although life can be unpredictable with a young child, somehow we always seem to find the time for the urgent priorities, the mundane things and the fun things.”
• And finally, don’t be afraid to make the choices that are best for your family.

At its core, When Business Meets Baby is about acceptance of the new role you’re taking on in becoming a mum, and being present in every moment, whether that’s at work or at home.